JON DILLOW

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8/15/2019

12 hours before you die

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We've all heard it before, "Live as if today was your last."  Its good advice but has become cliche.  Maybe for a moment, we consider how we might live differently.  But most of us, quickly fall back into the routine of the day.  

This is unfortunate.  The truth is, our time is limited, our moments precious.  Today could be my last day.  How could I allow that to practically change the way I live?

I'm a fan of journaling.  Writing out my thoughts helps me make sense of all the noise between my ears.  I find insights, discover buried emotions, and solve problems as I put pen to page. 

Regarding "mortality awareness": consciously facing my death in a way that brings more meaning to life, I've found the following journaling exercise helpful.  

I'll ask myself, "If you were to die tonight how would you have wanted to live the preceding 12 hours?"  

I asked myself that question today, here's an portion of my response:

  • Hug my children more
 
  • Not allow difficult emotions to rule me.  This means living honestly with them, experiencing them as much as necessary, not letting them control me by overly dwelling on them or repressing them.  Learn from them: what healthy shift in perspective could my sadness teach me, how might my fear provide an opportunity to grow in courage, how could my anger be channeled in a redemptive way. 
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  • Take risks: don't allow fear, insecurity, or practicality keep me from taking risks.
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  • Treat others with compassion and kindness.  If this were my last 12 hours, I'd want to live a day punctuated with simple gestures of gratitude, altruism, and generosity towards others.​​
 
  • Be gentle with yourself.  You want to live boldly in these 12 hours, but inevitable mistakes will occur.  Encounter these with a gentle touch, setting things right where you can, and graciously forgiving yourself.​​
 
  • Tell the people closest to me the way I feel and what I believe about them.
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  • Live on purpose: approach these 12 hours with intention rather than routine activity.  Choose how you will live this day.

That was my answer to the question, "If you were to die tonight how would you have wanted to live the preceding 12 hours?"  It changed the way I lived that day.

What would your answer be?  Taking a moment to figure that out just might change the way you live today.

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    During my training as a counselor we'd talk about what was happening "in the room".  This was a short hand way to referencing the dynamics and events happening within the counseling room.   It encompasses the experience of both "client" and "counselor" as well as the complex interplay between them both.  This blog is my reflections of what happens "in the room".  To protect confidentiality names are changed and permission has been given for any specific stories shared.     

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